Happy Year of the Dragon! This lucky year starts today, and watery me is borrowing some fiery energy.
TODAY I FLY AWAY: it will be my last day at the thrift store.
Bruce Lee was a Dragon. He said, “To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities”. A little of that goes a long way though (Putin, too, is a dragon). I like the fiery phoenix better, personally--and I read that they too are lucky, and complementary to the dragon in Chinese myth.
I choose them.
Firebird Costume Day, January 2020:
I was biking to work yesterday morning, and halfway there I felt a wave of repulsion--I can't stand to go in.
So I didn't, and I decided that rather than work two more weeks, I will make today, Saturday, my last day.
I'll say good-bye to some regulars (more of them come on Saturdays), clear out my stuff (bink can pick me up in the car), put a sign up in the break-room with my contact info--and call it DONE.
This feels so, so right.
I would just note that leaving on short notice is a norm
at the store. In fact, leaving with NO notice isn't uncommon at all.
People just stop coming.
But I did check with my Penny Cooper,
Holder of Standards, and she said it's okay. In fact, she huffed, and
tossed her head: "You've done more than enough! And you need to make us school clothes."
(She wants to come to school in my backpack and see the Big Kids.)
I am relieved to feel energized again.
My energy had dropped in November, not so unusual for the dark season, but they had not lifted again. I'd worried it might be permanent--maybe age related?
It
even crossed my mind, when I heard someone talk about how much
antidepressants helped them, to wonder if I needed antidepressants.
I strongly suspected, however, that it was my circumstances bringing me down--and as Bruce Lee said, circumstances can be changed (if you're lucky).
Even thinking that ^ can be energizing.
I was right: it was circumstances. Now I'm leaving, I realize how angry I am at Big Boss, and how damped down I was at work.
How
tired I am of working for the least---the least money, the least
support--and, worst of all--the least VISION. BB is a leader in the
negative: he uses his power to put the kibosh on things, not to lead
onward.
He throws fishing nets over dragons.
Anyway, I need time off between jobs because I have things to do!
I want to Be Prepared.
I expect I'll be tired, working almost full-time at a new job, and working hard processing incoming info. Also, I need to figure out stuff like what to make to take for lunch. I've rarely worked a job where you have to stay in place for regular hours--I forget how.
(I think I'll be working 8:30--3, which seems civilized.)
Online forecast for the dragon year:“You’ll be working a lot more but don’t be afraid of changes that may come. It’s going to help you get out of your comfort zone and you’ll grow really fast this year.”
_________
Yesterday, I turned my bike around and went grocery shopping. I bought supplies in large sizes I wouldn't normally, like a big box of laundry soap and a big bottle of body lotion.
At home, I did some little, important stuff I usually let slide-- online banking and medical tasks. And I gave my big Boston fern a warm shower in the tub.
And, OMG--I must attend to clothes. Not for girlettes--for me!
Most of mine are stained and ripped, and not how I want to present myself. I've been looking at the store but not finding anything. Women's clothes are so often ruined with a frill or a flower.
I want plain colored, long-sleeved T-shirts. So I am going to buy NEW clothes (!). bink will take me to the outlet stores.
Also, I want to catch up with some friends--some will be coming to town, and others are leaving. Write some letters... And old friend who teaches high school, but whom I've lost touch with.
I was thinking of an overnight in Duluth, but it's freezing cold there--not so nice.
I want to get all my phoenixes generally in a row...
I'd looked up plural of "phoenix"--here's a take on it.
I also found:
"a small group of phoenixes is called a venture; a large group of phoenixes is called an odyssey".
