I spent most of yesterday, Christmas Day, with Mz.
For a late breakfast, we had scrambled eggs and toast made in her new toaster (I'd gotten it at the thrift store), which she'd left here. Then we walked around the lake and went to see a new movie--
Vice about vice president Dick Cheney.
In record time, it joined my list of Movies I Left.
It starts with a notice, yellow words on the black screen:
This is a true story.
Then, below it, come the lines, something like:
At least as true as it could be, given that
Dick Cheney is the most secretive politician ever.
And another line:
But we tried our fucking best.
OMG. Is this supposed to be daring and clever?
Are you twelve? Or, do you think we are (twelve, not clever)?
Are you twelve? Or, do you think we are (twelve, not clever)?
I turned to Mz and whispered, "Is this going to be a bad movie?"
She said, "Let's wait and see."
Four minutes later, she whispered, "Yes, this is a bad movie,"
and we got up and left.
We hadn't even finished our popcorn.
During that five minutes, another banner came on the screen:
"Watch out for silent men. They wait, they listen, and then they strike." --Anonymous
ANONYMOUS???
You just made that lame quote up!
You just made that lame quote up!
And there was an almost constant voice-over, explaining everything. It was very odd. Everything signaled that this movie was badly made, despite a stellar cast, who I was almost sorry to leave.
The thing that made me eager to leave was that awful things flash on the screen with no warning. For instance, Cheney is walking down a hall and you see a second or two of a naked prisoner cowering (in Abu Ghraib?).
Administering random shocks is not a substitute for story-telling.
Administering random shocks is not a substitute for story-telling.
I don't think I've ever walked out of a movie so quickly.
We looked up reviews afterward, and lots of people confirmed that the movie does not get better after five minutes.
Most of the episode is simply different crew members talking (on "comlink") to an offscreen starship captain who is marooned alone on a barren planet. She has enough air to survive five days, and it's going to take our crew six to reach her, but they try anyway.
They, and we, never see her face.
Like most of Star Trek, this episode looks kind of cheap, the acting is uneven, and it's not particularly well written––but it has a gripping central idea.
It provided such a contrast to Vice:
a good story, simply told, wins by a mile over high-production quality and flashy editing.
